A preview of crowd-sourced medical reviews.

The New York Times reported this week that Nina Zagat, veteran restaurant-guide editor and the original crowd-sourcer, will be publishing comparable guides to health care professionals. The Big Money was able to obtain an advance copy of the guide; below are some excerpts.

Dr. Bertrand Godaux, general practice, Detroit
Enjoy the "sassy receptionists" and "dog-eared Hustlers" while "endlessly" "waiting for Godaux" at this "sketchy" Rust Belter. "Four out of five" patients say that this "quack's" use of "unsterilized instruments" makes them "uncomfortable," and his "obscene" Series 7 BMW compels a diagnosis of "Slumdoc millionaire."

Dr. Karl Benjamin, OB-GYN, Madison, Wis.
If "you be illin'," say ladies who've visited this "back-alley abortionist" with "all the charm of a Pap smear," five minutes with "Dr. Demento" will make you want to "call 911"; "the motto seems to be 'first, do harm,' " and "the copay is atrocious."

Dr. Adrian Van Rensselaer, podiatrist, New York
Never mind the waiting room's "cheap lithographs" and "Night of the Living Dead crowd." The main attraction here is "Dr. Who Said This Guy Was Good?" who may be "creepy" and look "nothing like his subway advertisements" but is "refreshingly willing to cash payday checks." ("There's no question that there's Medicare fraud going on here!" a regular enthuses.)

Dr. Miguel de la Rosa, pediatrician, Brookline, Mass.
Parents say that "Dr. Miguel" "es muy simpatico" but complain that he "really needs to work out the kinks" of his "hole-in-the-wall operation." Some also find "off-putting" his collection of "teddy bears" displayed "throughout the office." Says one parent: "He may be a saint, but I think I'll go elsewhere."

Dr. Paola Valentine, DDS, Morgantown, W.Va.
"Snaggle-toothed" dental hygienists and the doctor's own "rank halitosis" are hallmarks of a visit to "Dr. Feelbad," say avowed "non-anti-dentites," who nonetheless liken the experience to a "Marathon Man-worthy root canal without Novocain."